31 january 2022
the last newsletter i sent was in november 2020, and as you would probably expect, a lot has changed since then. here’s a quick recap of 2021:
i was actively freelancing at the beginning of the year. i wasn’t making a livable wage, but i was happy. i worked with a ton of fun people, and was actively learning about the world of tech more than ever.
i landed a full time gig @ contra as their first copywriter (+ micah landed a full time gig too).
traveled a ton and met the online friends that i’ve made during lockdown. it was a memorable time.
all of these things are fun and positive, things were looking up. but with the good, comes the bad:
i question my ability to push out quality work more than ever.
i’ve gained an unhealthy amount of weight + see myself in a poor light — using hair changes, body modifications, and closet changes to try to make myself feel better with no avail.
my parents both got COVID-19. my dad has been hospitalized since the beginning of december.
with the state of the world that’s at year two of the pandemic, it’s become increasingly harder and harder to see the light at the end of the tunnel— but not impossible.
the newsletters that i’m pushing out this year will be a lot different— all of you deserve to receive my truest self. these conversations will reflect my current emotions, state of mind, and how to conquer negative ones. i hope this newsletter will give you a sense of security and belonging, because you’re not alone in feeling the way you do.
in this month’s newsletter, i’ll be diving deeper into how i personally cope with the state of the world, its people, and what i’ve been doing to keep myself sane.
humans are inherently selfish, and it’s normal
it’s hard to be patient when no one knows what the hell is going on.
i’ll admit, i’ve hung out with friends (while vaccinated). been to a handful of concerts and sprained my ankle after leaving a few sweaty clubs over the summer. i folded and gave into the selfish temptation and feeling of “i’ve been stuck inside for over a year, i think i deserve this.” and in actuality, i did need it. i think i was truly going insane without the human connection.
it’s easy to feel angry and confused when we see others committing extremely selfish acts in midst of a pandemic, but i remind myself that they too, probably feel the same way i do. it’s not your responsibility to yell or scream to keep everyone in line.
crocheting gives me peace
i learned in the last year that i love creating things with my hands. i’ve picked up hand crocheting and knitting, and i used it to cope with my dad’s condition. i crocheted when i felt exhausted with phone calls, when i was waiting for my mom to finish her daily hospital visit, and when i was overthinking. sometimes, we need to shut all of the things off and focus on one thing at a time. it’s helped a lot during my time of need.
self help books for the soul
i’ve had a few self help books in my possession, and they’ve helped me learn about my emotional patterns and my reactions when the world feels like it’s crumbling.
the little book of shadow work — contains a handful of prompts that highlight five different inner workings of self: vulnerability, identity, personal philosophy, our inner child, + spirituality. i try to answer at least one prompt per day, but don’t beat myself up if i forget/don’t feel like it. it’s not a race. huge thank you to Nia for gifting this to me for the new year.
the gift of self love — your all-in-one book for your journey to self love in confidence. filled with writing prompts, exercises, affirmations, and background context from the author so you don’t ever feel alone in your emotions and thoughts.
creating something new — my portfolio
yesterday, i sat myself down and decided to create my portfolio from scratch. i had never truly designed anything outside of instagram posts, so it’s been fun getting into it and putting my own spin on things. learning something new is always liberating, and i’m excited to get up to work on it and make it come to life on webflow. you can follow my portfolio journey on my twitter.
rediscovering a forgotten hobby
in high school, i actively participated in the digital photography program. i walked around campus with a canon rebel t3i, took photos of my friends, and edited them on photoshop.
as an adult, i stopped taking the time to shoot. i stared at the world longingly, sad that i didn’t take a photo to commence the memory, but it was evident that taking photographs had a dear place in my heart (i have an entire photo album full of instax mini photos).
i ended up buying a point-and-shoot film camera. i shot everything. i developed old film. i fell in love with taking photographs again.
phew, you’re at the end of the article! since you got this far, i have one last thing to say to you. 🏃♀️💨
if it’s mentionable, it’s manageable. you’re in control of your time, your reactions, your perceptions, and the relationships that you create with others.
if anything is on your mind, feel free to reach out. i’m always down to chat.
see you next month.
xx jira